William Shakespeare runs into a friend after procrastinating through the plague of 1606

Hey Rick, it’s good to see you! Yeah, I’m just stoked to finally be out and about after the plague. What did I do during it? Oh…well, yeah…I, uh, I…wrote a play!

Yup. I definitely wrote another play. That’s basically my thing, writing plays, so of course I had to write one while in lockdown. Can you imagine calling myself William Shakespeare and not writing a play? At this point that would just be embarrassing. Yep, I wrote a play. Sure did.

What’s it called? Oh, the play…yeah…it’s called…uh, King…Lear. Yup. I’m pretty happy with it, but you never really know how these things are until you see them on the stage. That’s what I say about all my plays, especially after I write them, like this one that I just wrote. I’m just all about the stage, you know? The costumes, the performances, the whole theatrical experience, that’s it for me. Don’t get me wrong, writing plays all the time like I do is great, but the theatre is just something else! I just could blather on and on, but enough about me. What have you been up to?

What’s that? Oh, another question about the play. No, it’s fine. What’s it about? It’s about this, uh — hold on, I’m just going to take a sip of water here. Oh, that’s good..almost done…jeez, I must be parched…just let me get this last drop here. Ah, that hit the spot!

So, what were we talking about? Oh, that’s right. The play I wrote. Well, I don’t want to give the whole thing away just talking about it, since I’m all about the theatrical experience. I know I already said that, I was just reiterating. Anyways, it’s about this uh, King…Lear. He’s from this old legend from back in the day. It’s a crazy story, I’m surprised you haven’t heard about it. Are you sure? (long sigh)

Alright, then, I’ll tell you about the play. Is there anymore water? No? That’s fine.

Soooo, in my play, there’s an old king and he wants to give his kingdom to his…sons? Sorry, I mean his daughters. That’s obviously the more interesting choice. That’s why I decided on that while in lockdown. Some people seemed to have spent the whole plague just baking bread and masturbating. That’s what I heard. I didn’t do anything like that, obviously. I wrote a play.

On second thought, I really don’t want to bore you talking about the play I wrote. Plus the troupe would kill me! You know how they are, “Shakespeare, stop constantly talking about all your plays you’ve written!!” Haha. But you’ve got to come see it. Opening night, I’ll hook you up for sure.

No, no, you can’t read it. Believe me, you’re going to want to see this thing! When I was writing it I was like “oh yeah, this has to be seen.” It’s probably my most visual play so far. I don’t want people to just read it. I want them to experience it. Right, yeah, the theatrical experience.

When does it debut? God, you’re really asking a lot of questions about this play. No, that’s good. I’m always happy to answer questions about plays I’ve just recently finished, like King Lear, which I absolutely finished during the plague.

Well, opening night is sort of up in the air. I guess people want to wait awhile after the plague cools down before they really open up. Lots of bodies to clean up and all. The venue told me “whenever you’re — I mean — we’re ready, we’ll put your play on.” So I’m basically just waiting on them. I’m just so tired of waiting, having finished this play and all.

Oh, would you look at the time! I actually have to boogie. I just started writing a new play, Yes, a new one. Crazy, right? It seems like I’m always working on these plays, but especially in a plague. Guess, that’s just my thang. But I will definitely hook you up when King John debuts. What? Oh my gosh, yes, King Lear, of course. There’s a character named John in my new play, so I guess I’m just focused on that. Lear who?! Hahaha. Anyways, it was really great running into you!